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Text: Gov. Cuomo Demands Sheridan Statue Removal From Capitol

by Chris Chichester on 08/23/17

New York State Democratic Committee
Attn: Chairman Byron Brown
750 Third Avenue
31st Floor
New York, N.Y. 10017

Dear Chairman Brown,

I write to you today about the assault on public monuments by a collection of anarchists found in our party.  We must encourage this contemptible, aberrant behavior given how they sustain us in power.  Especially here in Albany, New York as Members of the Senate and Assembly.

Our New York State Capitol is constructed between 1867 and 1899. Its Romanesque Revival/Neo-Renaissance style is conceived by the architects Thomas Fuller, Leopold Eidlitz, Isaac G. Perry and Henry Hobson Richardson. These privileged white men are fascists opposed to diversity due to the exclusion of women, minorities, 1199/S.E.I.U., homosexuals, fashion designers, transgender, IDC, WFP, AFL-CIO, Occupy Wall Street, AARP, ACLU, NYSUT and Wilson Elser Moskowitz Edelman & Dicker, LLP.

On October 7, 1916 a statue of General Philip Henry Sheridan is dedicated at the Capitol in Albany.  Mayor John Stevens said:

"I do not possess the eloquence to do so, nor is it my function to speak of the great military genius, the great services rendered to the nation by General Sheridan. This will be dwelt upon by the eminent speakers whom I shall have the honor to introduce.  My only desire is to express the appreciation of all concerned for this beautiful memorial — dedicated to the memory of General Philip H. Sheridan in the city of his birth."

Governor Martin Glynn said:

"State pride and local pride demand that this be done."

From "New Perspectives On The West" at PBS in 2001:

"A ruthless warrior, General Philip Sheridan played a decisive role in the Army's long campaign against the native peoples of the plain, forcing them onto reservations with the tactics of total war."

Ruthless warrior. Total war.  Like you, I am offended at these violent descriptions.  Did General Sheridan possess the decency to sing Kumbaya as a first attempt to avoid conflict? It worked for Peter, Paul & Mary.  Someone's Crying Lord, Kumbaya.  I now require a Kleenex.

More from PBS:

"Following the tactics he had employed in Virginia, Sheridan sought to strike at the material basis of the Plains Indian nations.  He believed -- correctly, it turned out -- that attacking the Indians' in their encampments during the winter would give him the element of surprise and take advantage of the scarce forage available for Indian mounts.  He was unconcerned about the likelihood of high casualties among noncombatants, once remarking that 'If a village is attacked and women and children killed, the responsibility is not with the soldiers but with the people whose crimes necessitated the attack.'

"The first demonstration of this strategy came in 1968, when three columns of troops under Sheridan's command converged on what is now northwestern Oklahoma to force the Kiowa, Comanche, Arapaho and Cheyenne onto their reservations. The key engagement in this successful campaign was George Armstrong Custer's surprise attack on Black Kettle's encampment along the Washita River, an attack that came at dawn after a forced march through a snowstorm.  Many historians now regard this victory as a massacre, since Black Kettle was a peaceful chief whose encampment was on reservation soil, but for Sheridan the attack served its purposes, helping to persuade other bands to give up their traditional way of life and move onto the reservations."

My second floor aides inform me Capitol ghosts are offended at the continuing presence of the General Sheridan monument.  We Democrats always respect the sensitivities and feelings expressed by minority New Yorkers.  Especially ghosts.  I will appoint a Moreland Act Commission to investigate the disenfranchisement of ghosts.  Ghost Lives Matter.

Controversy surrounds this quote from General Sheridan:

"The only good Indians I ever saw were dead."

General Sheridan denied he used such base language.  It is irrelevant. We know he said it.  We know he said it without performing the research since historical accuracy is a joke.  If you seek historical accuracy read Gordon S. Wood.  My friend Chris Chichester recommends The Radicalism of the American Revolution but he informs me the word "revolution" enrages our gun control base.

Today I announce a bi-partisan commission to investigate the removal of the General Sheridan statue from the Capitol.  I directed these all-stars to conclude the statue requires removal as it has debased our moral and ethical standards for 100+ years. How did we fail to comprehend his deplorable presence?
  
My Office of General Services features a biography of General Sheridan:

"General Philip Henry Sheridan (1831-1888) was one of the most celebrated heroes of the Civil War.  He was commander of the Union Army of the Shenandoah Valley, and is best remember for a historic twenty-mile gallop on his famous horse Rienze to rally his retreating troops to victory at Cedar Creek, Virginia.  Backed by infantry, his cavalry command also blocked Lee's escape at Appomattox.  After the Civil War Sheridan remained in the regular Army and served as commander-in-chief for the last five years of his life.  While growing up he lived with his family in Albany for about two years; in 1914 a state commission was formed in the capital city to organize the construction of a monument to Sheridan's memory."

I have ordered this offensive biography removed from the OGS site and instructed Commissioner RoAnn M. Destito to implement a counseling program for every state employee traumatized by it.  Please call RoAnn's Corning Tower office.  Let us always remember that Mayor Erastus Corning ran a corrupt political machine.  I plan to introduce legislation to remove Corning Tower from the Empire State Plaza.

From "Mayor for Life: He Left His Heart in City Hall" by Paul Grondahl in The New York Times on February 2, 1998:

"But a long career in politics had taught Corning that life could not be so neatly divided into black and white.  He wrote, 'In politics a modest amount of corruption is helpful in getting along.'"

Albany remains infested with corruption and our capital city mayor-for-life endorsed its deplorable existence.  How is "a modest amount of corruption" defined?  I'll ask my personal Luca Brasi AKA Joseph Percoco.

From "Cuomo: Extreme Conservatives . . . Have No Place In The State of New York" by Casey Seiler in the Times Union on January 17, 2014:

"Their problem is not me and the Democrats; their problem is themselves. Who are they? Are they these extreme conservatives who are right-to-life, pro-assault weapon, anti-gay? Is that who they are? Because if that's who they are and they're the extreme conservatives, they have no place in the state of New York because that's not who New Yorkers are."

I prefer one-party absolutism that destroyed the former Soviet Union in my capital.  In this totalitarian sanctum there is no opposition party. As the opposition party is a nuisance of epic proportions.

Today I define a New Yorker. All thoughtful New Yorkers politicize the 2,977 innocent men, women and children killed on September 11, 2001 by Osama bin-Laden and his 19 psychopaths.  There is no event in human history that rivals this evil attack yet I chose to exploit its terrorism during my vanquished 2002 gubernatorial campaign/fiasco/vanity project:

"Rudy Giuliani was the hero of 9-11.  But Governor George E. Pataki stood behind the leader. He held the leader's coat. He was a great assistant to the leader. But he was not a leader."

Giuliani: "The reality is the governor was a full partner. I held his coat as often as he held mine. We supported one another."

I served as Secretary of Housing and Urban Development from January 29, 1997 to January 20, 2001. On July 11, 2000 at the dedication of the Robert C. Weaver Federal Building in Washington, D.C. I said:

"One month ago this department sued the Ku Klux Klan in Pennsylvania and its Grand Dragon in Pennsylvania for harassing an interracial couple."

Grand Andrew as the HUD philosophizer does not recall the outcome of this case.  Given how the terms "Ku Klux Klan" and "harassing an interracial couple" are not in the jurisdiction of the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development.  Yet I believed I could transform HUD into the U.S. Department of Justice since I was married to Kerry Kennedy and her father Robert served as Attorney General.  For more on "Daddy" read the Daily News op-ed "Teach Kids To Understand, Not Worship, Bobby Kennedy" by my charming, handsome friend Chris Chichester from December 6, 2008.

By virtue of nepotism I reigned as the top aide to my father Governor Mario Cuomo after his Inauguration on January 1, 1983.  For 30+ years I've remained ignorant as to the history of the General Sheridan statue. Ignorance defines the extremist Left as we today riot for the destruction of Confederate monuments and other historic structures that offend our vacuous and shallow existence. 

From my palatial Executive Mansion at 138 Eagle Street in Albany I am the elitist certified to determine the character and the fitness for residency in New York.  I am the Nineteen Eighty-Four Big Brother who tells you how to think. I am the Working Families Party colossus. I am the intolerant judge who decrees the definition of a New Yorker.  Do You Know Who I Am?
 
Andrew Cuomo
Governor
State of New York

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Freedom Lies In Being Bold — Robert Frost
www.eff.org